Eureka! I have figured it out!
I now know exactly how I want our wedding, it’s not a theme per-say but it’s a way to think of approaching the various themes I get so excited about and a step on the way to sorting out which ones or parts of ones are right for us. I want this wedding to be Happy, Relaxed, Mellow and Us.
A few of you who have been putting up with me recently may perhaps breathe a bit of a sigh of relief at this revelation. Others of you who know me better know not to hold that hope very long as typically I change my mind like the weather, totally convinced of whatever I’m on at the time.
At risk of having to eat my words later, this feels a lot more like a permanent decision. And really, to many those four little words will not indicate any sort of feel or theme or entice a mental picture of the outcome but for me, it’s a framework, a model against which I can apply all these ideas that are thrown around and grab the ones that fit and let those that are not in line with the framework pass on by.
Some of you may also know that my better half is writing his own side of the story of planning the wedding at A Groom’s Tale. Recently he posted about wedding planning as a negotiation and the need to expand the pie and clearly define every parties underling needs rather than wants in order to come to a consensus. Well, these four little words, these are my needs. So how are they manifested? Well I don’t know yet but I can define them a bit further:
Happy – I want everyone and us to have a great time. I know this seems like a given or sort of a strange thing to have as a theme-ing framework but I think it can contribute to which elements work for us. It makes me think about the people coming, what sorts of things make us happy, makes them happy, what does it look like. To me this means adding in some unique things, fun things even which take people out of the normal protocol situations and get them enjoying themselves and having a memorable, Happy experience. This includes us!
Relaxed – No not informal, just relaxed. I don’t want to be stressed on the day but also in the planning. I want things to go smoothly and to be clear about what’s important to us. I want the day to feel special and right for everyone and this means making our guests comfortable and feeling confident that everything’s taken care of in terms of planning etc… Fortunately for me I have a very organised brilliant and wonderful MOH and FH who will probably save the day. 🙂 Love you guys.
Mellow – This doesn’t mean I want a dull nothing happening party, it just means I don’t want the pomp and circumstance or really even much of a spotlight. I know we’ll be the focus point for everything but really I see this as more being able to share with our very closest friends and family a happy occasion. I don’t see us at the head of some un-touchable table looking out over our guests in any way… more like they’re all along-side us. I want our guests to feel like this to. I may even go so far as to say one big happy family. 🙂 I want it to be beautiful and I want to incorporate the traditions which make it a special occasion but gently and in a simple, classy sort of understated way.
Finally, Us. I want it to feel like us, how we are together, bits of our personality and some quirk-y-ness that makes us who we are. I want our guests and friends to be able to look at the photos and attend the wedding and remark that it was exactly what they would have thought our wedding would look like and that it suited us. I firmly believe that our memories of this day will be greater and last longer if it’s filled with elements that represent and reflect who we are. So even if it’s cute or clever or beautiful and elegant, if it’s not us.. it’s out. 🙂
Stay tuned for more wedding revelations in the near future, I think they’re gonna keep on coming… fingers crossed anyway.